by the RIYF staff

MOSCOW- For years, a Western-funded, Russophobic parody site has mocked Russia and our dear leader. Thankfully their tomfoolery is soon coming to an end.

Russia Insider, or more accurately Russophobia Inside Her, was a site clearly designed to embarrass pro-Russian journalism by using ridiculous hyperbole. They try to embarrass people like our fine staff by making all pro-Russia journalists seem like Putin (Glory to his name) worshipers and conspiracy theorists. Well now this site has been exposed for what we all knew it was- a CIA psyop.

How do we know this to be true? Well as others have pointed out, Russia Insider was constantly demanding donations from its readership. Via ads and crowdfunding campaigns, these little information warriors constantly had their hand out. But that raises a poignant question- Why do you need all these donations…WHEN YOU’RE OBVIOUSLY FUNDED BY THE CIA?! Checkmate, fools!

By stark contrast, RIYF has never asked for donations. We just got a grant for 25 million USD from the Russian government, and the check came with an exquisite fruit basket purchased by RT chief editor Margarita Simonyan herself. The authorities shed this largesse on RIYF because we are all veteran information warriors who have proven our worth in countless running battles on people’s Facebook walls and Youtube comment sections. By the Russian Orthodox God, if you were slandering our great and wise leader online and unaware that you were a pathetic Western NATO-loving faggot, any one of us would make you keenly aware of that fact within a few seconds. We are winners. And the Russian government knows how to pick winners.

Of course we cannot stop people from donating to us if they seriously want to. A lot of people love our hard-hitting investigative journalism so much that they are determined to give us money. This being the case, it’s obvious that if such a person were to, say, email their credit card details WITH their 3-digit CVV2 code to russiainyourface419@yahoo.ng, there really is nothing we can do to prevent the transaction. In this case, not accepting their generous donation would be tantamount to treason.

As for Russia Insider, you guys might want to take a trip back to Langley and work on your strategy a bit. Put in a little effort and maybe you can pull off a real CIA black op, just like Navalny and Browder’s handlers.